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Guest MacGregor

John Constantine Vs......

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Guess it's time for the John vs. Link (from Legend of Zelda battle)! Get to it!

 

Coralys-"Uch" is Test's way of saying "Much". He's Canadian, don't you know? They're notorious for leaving the first letter off words!

"'Hat's 'Uch 'Do 'Bout 'Othing!" to quote Shakespeare in Canadian. :lol:

Right, of course, that's how people here in Canada talk. How could I not have noticed that. :)

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Constantine versus one (or all) of Warren Ellis' Constantine impersonator characters?

 

Constantine: Who the hell are you?

WECIC: I'm John Constantine.

Constantine: No you're not. I'm John Constantine.

WECIC2: No I am John Constantine.

WECIC3: No I am John Constantine.

WECIC4: No I am John Constantine.

Constantine: Do I look like Kirk bloody Douglas?

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ITS THE SAME LEVEL REPEATED, AND NOT THAT WELL!

 

Anywho, as for John vs Link-

 

John:What the ell's with the tights.

Link: ...........

John: And the skirt

Link:............

John:and the earring

Link:..........

John: And the....latex?

Link: Haaaaaaaaaaayak!

John:......Right. Fancy a smoke then?

Navi: Watch out!

John:Piss off you sodding christmas tree light

Navi: Watch out! Watch out! Watch out!

*John swats Navi*

Link: uughewawl

John: Right. Can I 'ave some of the magic Pixie dust then?

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ITS THE SAME LEVEL REPEATED, AND NOT THAT WELL!

 

Anywho, as for John vs Link-

 

John:What the ell's with the tights.

Link: ...........

John:  And the skirt

Link:............

John:and the earring

Link:..........

John:  And the....latex?

Link:  Haaaaaaaaaaayak!

John:......Right.  Fancy a smoke then?

Navi: Watch out!

John:Piss off you sodding christmas tree light

Navi:  Watch out!  Watch out!  Watch out!

*John swats Navi*

Link:  uughewawl

John:  Right.  Can I 'ave some of the magic Pixie dust then?

 

 

Navi: Thats a John constantine...Z target him and atack with your sword while he lghts his cigarrete.

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well,i beat ocarina of time yesterday....i had a lot of zelda in my system

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YESTERDAY? it's been 8 years! That was the game that almost made me cry. When you see Epona in the credits, I truly thought I'd never be able to ride her again...sniff.

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yeah,well...here is the deal,i never had an N64 or a game cube....so i played majoras mask and ocarina of time in my computer

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You can do that? Hmmmmmmmmm is this blasphemy or spreading the word?

 

Still, get on to the others, i.e. wind waker, link to the past, alla em.

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yeah....as soon as i buy a decent graphic card...the one i have right now si only enough to play n64 games

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oooh,i played the snes one....i also tried to get trough minish cap....but it bored me a lot

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Grab ze snes ones first.  mmmmmmmmmm pixels

That's a good one. Bloody difficult too: I never managed to kill Bannon (or whatever he's called) at the end.

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Constantine versus one (or all) of Warren Ellis' Constantine impersonator characters?

 

Constantine: Who the hell are you?

WECIC: I'm John Constantine.

Constantine: No you're not. I'm John Constantine.

WECIC2: No I am John Constantine.

WECIC3: No I am John Constantine.

WECIC4: No I am John Constantine.

Constantine: Do I look like Kirk bloody Douglas?

WECIC shall from here and now on be the term used to discribe Warren's syndrome.

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YESTERDAY?  it's been 8 years!  That was the game that almost made me cry.  When you see Epona in the credits, I truly thought I'd never be able to ride her again...sniff.

 

Fuck! I just figured out Epona was the horse! I was wondering what you were on about.....

 

I loved that game. I bought it when it first came out and beat it in a few months. Second best Zelda game after "Link to the Past".

Sadly, I sold my Nintendo 64 on one of my frequent moves from apartment to apartment. I wish I'd have kept it now, but I was thinking, "I have a GameCube now and they only made 20 games for the 64, why bother to keep it?"

 

I'm sure all this talk belongs in Down the Local, so I leave the conversation now.

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Just before you do, and we get back to the actual subject (possibly), when the Nintendo Revolution comes out, you'll be able to play all the old nintendo games on it. ALSO, Ocarina of time came out on a special bonus disk with wind waker for gamecube, which is all over Ebay. Whilst your there, buy me something pretty wouldja?

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Guest spiderlegs

John meets Sin City's Marv at a bar. Marv doesn't like John's accent because he sounds like a nancy boy...and there's only one Nancy...

 

 

Then what happens?

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Guest spiderlegs

Did I overskim and miss Marv? Good lord, I may have to retire. I just can't keep up with you younglings anymore. WHat good is immortality if you still age? At some point, will I become a living puddle of liquid decay? That's not what I asked from the genie. Thou hast cursed me, forever!

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Well what you didn't know my little Arachnoid appendage friend, is that that Genie is here tonight, laughing as your bodily functions begin to break down. Because tonight Spiderlegs, THIS IS YOUR LIFE!

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Guest spiderlegs

Oh, no! But my life is a repeat! It's on mid-season hiatus. It was cancelled due to a boycott by the christian coalition (the other one). The actors are on strike. The writers are drunk. And no one has seen the producer, but they found his car in a lake. My life is a trivia question on someone's Geocities site.

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Q: What form of life spends several years at a time choosing targets for hideous, violent death, before baking cookies.

 

A:Spiderlegs.

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