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The Shittest Character In Hellblazer, Ever!

The Shittest Character In Hellblazer, Ever!  

35 members have voted

  1. 1. Who's the shittiest?

    • Rich The Punk
      3
    • First of The Fallen
      4
    • Aleister Crowley
      3
    • King of Vampires
      3
    • Agent Turro
      8
    • Angie Spatchcock
      0
    • Chris Cole
      4
    • S. W. Manor
      6
    • Papa Midnite
      2
    • Master Of The Third
      2
    • Nigel The Drop
      0
    • Zombie Ade
      0


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I had a energetic day at work so I'm tired and grumpy, therefore there were a few nominations that I've ignored, all along the lines of 'that guy who....'. I honestly couldn't be bothered to do the legwork and look up characters if the nominators couldn't either.

 

Also Gemma Masters is not in the poll because no one was willing to nominate her outside of the context of Mina's short run, which as I said was unfair.

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Now should I vote for Nigel (because I nominated him) or the King of them vampires (because itr's obviously him)? One of those tricky moral decisions I'll need to sleep on, methinks.

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Now should I vote for Nigel (because I nominated him) or the King of them vampires (because itr's obviously him)? One of those tricky moral decisions I'll need to sleep on, methinks.

 

 

Wow, that was a pretty solid list of shitty characters, I have to agree, though I disagree about Rich and Nigel, whom I enjoyed. Although I had originally said the First of the Fallen and S.W. Manor in the previous discussion, I voted for the Master of the Third Place, whom I'd completely forgotten about until seeing him on the list. That went straight to the top of the list once I remembered him, though it was a toss-up between him and Chris Cole. And since I finished re-reading the Mina run today, I am fully aware of just how dire both characters were.

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Likewise. The unholy combination of shitness and prominence.

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I went with Rich because although The First of The Funky has been predominantly badly handled, Mike Carey proved he can work. And because if he'd been allowed to be post-Gaiman, pre-Carey Lucifer it would have undone the fabric of time and we'd not have had Lucifer to enjoy.

 

I would have voted for Reanimated Ade because clearly he was under-used.

 

Back when Luis stomped around this place like a huge phallic manhood charged with keeping the women down, I argued for Gemma as a good character/unlikable person, and so am glad she was not included here, just because Denise Mina did not understand her.

 

Turro was Azzarello's self in Hellblazer, because he couldn't be John. On reflection now, I like the way he had "himself" be ridiculed by Constantine. In fact there are a lot more nuances to Azz's work on re-reading, but he STILL never got Constantine. Just like SW Manor never.

 

The Batman analogue was damned annoying as a nerdy comics reference, but worked well in the flashback story. I'd say Azz had good ideas but poor execution and that's true with these two characters.

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http://hellblazer.ipbhost.com/index.php?showtopic=6098

 

for the latecomers.

 

And since I missed this first time round I include me:

 

Her characters weren't memorable enough to bother hating.

I'm going to backtrack a little here, Gemma suddenly falling for that no-mark twat...that stood out more than just a little, so I guess he's worth a vote...whatever his name was.

 

It's been said in the above thread, but I agree with this.

The only acceptable part is that it can be explained as Gemma getting messed up by the empathy vibe thing.

 

Therefore if she ever when she returns, I'd like to see a reference to her "waking up one day and realising he was a dick". Of course they never diss previous writers' work that way ...

 

Here's something.

Everyone knows its the 20th Anniversary of Hellblazer soon and I am thinking of updating & expanding the Hellblazer talk that Mike and Joel did a few years ago. Therefore, inspired by this poll, I'll be starting a series of polls (probably more positive ones, but as a nod to Matt's grouchy self, this one will feature prominently) about Hellblazer.

 

Go to that other thread now (or in a few minutes when I have started it), and now get back to discussing THIS poll.

 

Crowley & King of the Vamps - you fucking nerds and your crossovers. If you want Swamp Thing, the JLA and Cock Man from Earth ZZZ, THIS is what you get.

 

That Third Place Business - WHY? Blairite satire opportunity pissed away in the wind.

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Crowley & King of the Vamps - you fucking nerds and your crossovers. If you want Swamp Thing, the JLA and Cock Man from Earth ZZZ, THIS is what you get.

 

What in the name of fuck are you blithering on about now?

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As long as he makes sense to himself, I suppose he's happy. And isn't that the most important thing, really?

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I probably should have voted Chris Cole but it's hard to blame everything I didn't like about Mina's run solely on the one new character.

 

So I voted for Agent Turro because of how frustrated I was that his character never really went anywhere or did anything. And then died.

 

I unpopularly quite enjoy at least half of Azzarello's run but I just feel that Turro was a wasted opportunity. His company have a file on John? He's trying to get him to run errands for him? He's part of a bigger pitcture that are using JC as a pawn - or maybe vice versa?

 

Oh, he's dead.

 

 

Maybe he isn't the *shittest* character ever but he was the one that had the potential to make everything around him better and could have changed how a lot of readers really perceived Azz's run. And *THEN* died.

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No votes for Nigel: I shouldn't have watsed time nominating him, should I?

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Mark's prominence statement makes the most sense, however it's Crowley for me.

Aleister Fucking Crowley!

Sorry Jenkin's, but what a waste!

(Or did I miss Jenkins' joke?)

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I still haven't voted. It's so hard. They're all so... shitty. How can I possibly decide? I almost voted for Agent Turro. But then I remembered Nigel. And the King of Vampires is pretty bad, too. I better decide soon. When are you closing this?

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Daft cliche who was written in purely to fulfill a plot function and who Ennis (as a result) never made any effort to characterise.

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Even in a field as strong as this, S.W. Manor succeeds in standing out. Not only did he fulfil no discernible dramatic purpose, I never even worked out what Azz was trying to achieve with him. Even the First (for whom I retain an inexplicable fondness, despite his nigh-unforgivable dim-wittedness) and Papa Midnite were written well at times (i.e. by Carey and Delano respectively), and served a narrative purpose. Manor, however, managed (like Azz's run, in my not-so-humble opinion) to be pointlessly cack from start to finish.

 

And no, I didn't like Nigel much either. Defend Ennis as I might, crassly one-dimensional supporting characters (see also Header) remain the element of his Hellblazer run (and, indeed, his style in general) that most disappointed me.

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