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A. Heathen

The Future That YOU Wanted (Constantine #2)

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Ha, ha! Is this really a solicitation? They're getting lazier all the time.

"Which ghostly menace haunts Constantine today?"

 

Man, remember when DC:THe Dark launched, and everyone was so excited? It felt like the glory days of DC were coming back....and then, slowly, we lost interest in book after book.

Until we end up with "Constantine messing up Gemworld!" and "Flash visiting the House of Mystery!".

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That's what Herr DiDio thinks!

 

Somewhere in his Disney office, Alan Horn is laughing at us all since the hiring of Dan DiDio happen on his watch during his time as WB Pres. Plus those revised contracts regarding Vertigo.

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Man, remember when DC:THe Dark launched, and everyone was so excited? It felt like the glory days of DC were coming back....and then, slowly, we lost interest in book after book.

 

Until we end up with "Constantine messing up Gemworld!" and "Flash visiting the House of Mystery!".

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xdBcsdk8pEY

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I read it in the shoppe.

 

[ Spoiler :

So, the Spectre assumes the role of First of the Fallen, laying claim to John's soul the second he dies, huh? yawn.

 

Mister E is a terrible villain and the low brow bickering between him and Sargon's daughter is on par with the worst ever campy Penguin/Catwoman bickering. And how convenient to find is everything. "It's always the first place you look, innit?"

 

And when they show all the people who died because of John, there's a gaggle of them, but we only know Chris. It's all just the lamest retread, tired cliche plot over and over. "I must find all the pieces of the magic object and put it together before evil destroys the world." Fuck off!

 

And John gets to come home to the flavor of the past 3 years - ZOMBIES! Wheeee! Who's sick of zombies being everywhere already? Not me, said no one ever today, the day when zombies reach their saturation. WD's shitty season finale, zombies in every other comic and even John Boy gets him some undeadities.

]God, DC sucks. They are the scum at the bottom of the barrel and I can't believe anyone worth a fuck would even put themselves in a position to be fucked over by DC's lack of anything tangible, its terrible storytelling, and NO FUCKING heart or humor at all. I keep thinking, how much more lame can it get. If I stop asking that question, will they stop answering it? Shit!

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fiddlesticks. I actually liked the beginning of the issue but it devolved so quickly into cliches and conveniences, like all these neu 52 books do, that it destroyed the positive path it was on and crawled back into its realm of absurdity.

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The new Mr. E is so stupid. Not that anyone remembered or cared about the character by 2013 anyway, but a southern gentleman? Really? He's not an interesting character anymore. Did they change his origin to make him more PG friendly? But, still, why a southern gentleman?

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The new Mr. E is so stupid. Not that anyone remembered or cared about the character by 2013 anyway, but a southern gentleman? Really? He's not an interesting character anymore. Did they change his origin to make him more PG friendly? But, still, why a southern gentleman?

 

Because he wears (wore) a white suit.

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The new Mr. E is so stupid. Not that anyone remembered or cared about the character by 2013 anyway, but a southern gentleman? Really? He's not an interesting character anymore. Did they change his origin to make him more PG friendly? But, still, why a southern gentleman?

 

Because he wears (wore) a white suit.

 

So he'll have a Tennessee Williams type lisp then...

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Whilst I wouldn't pay cash money for it, parts of this were alright - the opening in particular and John's joke both made for decent Constantine moments.

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Not having read it, I have only one complaint about it.

 

IT IS A DOCTOR STRANGE COMIC WRITTEN BY WARREN ELLIS.

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yeah, i need a new hobby. thank fuck Saga is so good and Bedlam so weird or I wouldn't have much of a pull list. Those two, Walking dead, Fables and Unwritten are all that remain of a once epic pull list stack. those aren't the only ones I buy, just my pull list.

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Whilst I wouldn't pay cash money for it, parts of this were alright - the opening in particular and John's joke both made for decent Constantine moments.

 

Having now read it, I'd agree with all of this, Constantine is well written in the context of a rubbish story.

I really don't care for the New Books Of Magic thing that is going on in the DCU.

Sargoness and Mister E are awful. And the use of the Spectre is extremely gratuitous except in retconning the Hellblazer story about "YOUR SOUL IS MINE, JOHN CONSTANTINE". Incidentally, the Spectre turning up to retribute a DC hero (even an anti-hero) is the equivalent of Superman and Spider-Man fighting due to a simple misunderstanding. The Spectre should do better research.

 

I much prefer this art to Camuncoli & co.

But that cover is ugly.

 

The next issue being in London is going to annoy me a lot, isn't it?

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Yeah, I'm something of a fan of Ryp's style but that's an awful cover, I think the Spectre's appearance was quite literally gratuitous and mandated by the 'WTF Month' nonsense.

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God, DC sucks. They are the scum at the bottom of the barrel and I can't believe anyone worth a fuck would even put themselves in a position to be fucked over by DC's lack of anything tangible

DC is also the company which publishes The Unwritten, Fables, 100 bullets and tons of other stuff.

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I thought they stopped publishing 100 Bullets a while ago?

:tongue:

The Unwitten is definitely the best thing it has going at the moment (I'd make a case for Dial H as well, but I know there's those on here who loathe that), but it may be gearing up to get messed up by a crossover with the far less impressive (and to my way of thinking, deeply annoying, but I know I'm in a minority on that one) Fables.

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I thought they stopped publishing 100 Bullets a while ago?

:tongue:

 

True enough. But we are getting a Brother Lono miniseries by Azzarello / Risso in the summer. Yay!

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Actually, Vertigo Comics publishes those good comics...but their output has been getting more bare.

If you want to be pedantic, you can say that AOL/Time Warner is responsible for both those horrible DC Comics and those rare gems at Vertigo Comics that are substantially better.

 

Fables was decent at one time, but it should have ended long ago. I've always found it over-rated though. It was a perfectly fine read, but it gets such high praise at times, which it simply doesn't deserve.

 

I thought that Dial H was on the chopping block now.

 

Anything to not discuss Constantine. heh

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