Claire
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Posts posted by Claire
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No, not everyone enjoys saluting the rear admiral.
A while ago I read about a paper by a Jane Austen expert claiming that a joke about Rear Admirals in 'Persuasion' was a sly reference to homosexuality in the British Navy. I like the idea of Jane Austen making dirty jokes.
And while I'm here howsabout some more truth?
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Seconding the love Donny. Hope it all works out fine.
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OK Wolfram, what's the most enbarassing injury you've ever sustained?
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.... a monkey like horn-ball who loves to eat women.
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Ah ha! So you admit you're not a lady either!
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Horses sweat, men perspire and ladies glow.
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Well I'm shocked at Claire, everyone knows that ladies don't fart!
But Keeyah ladies can't be held accountable for things they do in their sleep.
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OK. Every year in Febuary (height of NZ summer) me and a bunch of girlfriends go stay at the beach for a week. Swimming and picnics in the day, much drunkeness and running round the beach playgrounds singing at the top of our lungs at night. One of the funnest things is being in an all girl environment and completely dropping the pretence that we are refined creatures. Like when my friend returned from the toilet block, struck a dramatic pose in our cabin doorway and declared 'that was one of the five best shits of my life!'.
Anways this one night a girl we knew from high school was in the area so she came to visit is. Now this girl doesn't have a vulgar bone in her body. She's so refined she got a scholarship for playing cello. Worse yet she had a friend from work with her that we were meeting for the first time.
Now I had drunk rather a lot of rum that day. On top of rather a lot of rum the previous day. And being stuck in a hot cabin having sedate conversation made me rather sleepy, so I crawled into the bunk beds for a nap. I still kinda aware of my surroundings, and after lying there for a while I started to feel this wonderful warm feeling of release, almost like sinking into a hot bath when your muscles are aching. Then I became aware of this low rumbling sound. A dreadful suspision set in. I open my eyes to find everyone silent and staring at me. They had timed me , and for the last 1 and a half minutes I had let out a continuous, deep rumbling fart of pure rum fumes.
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Claire...your signature is...interesting. What is it?
it sounds like a parody on Jane Austen
Nope, it's an absolutely geniune 1900's-1910's book on ettiquette.
EDIT: Yay Ben :D (first time I've ever used a smilely and it's in your honour)
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Dare I break out the saga of the rummy fart?
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In it's entirety, the passage reads
"It would be well for a gentleman who has not been in the habit of riding with ladies to take a lesson in mounting them at any livery stable he cares to attend. The service is quite simple:
The lady will be found standing by her horse, with her hand on the sadle. She extends her left foot, which she will place in the opened palm of the hand of the gentleman mounting her. She makes a neat spring which he, by a gentle push upwards, accelerates, and in this manner she gains her seat in the saddle. He now adjusts her foot (or feet should she ride astride) in the stirrups, and the rider is ready for the going.
He should explain if he has a restive horse and does not dismount for this reason."
Read with smut in mind, it's a passage that always makes me chuckle.
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It's from a most usful volume I own- Ward Lock and Co's Etiquette for Gentlemen: A Guide to the Observances of Good Society
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Oh, go ahead Red
You know you really want to
You already have
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I dare you to write a subliminal message into your paper propositioning your professor. Have the initial letters of every 5th word spell out something filthy, or the like.
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He he he, that's the spirit.
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Physical Challenge!
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Go for it Hilde. Next time you talk you should try and turn the conversation to movies, find one you both want see, and ask him to come see it with you- or complain you don't have anyone to see it with, he might take the hint.
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Anoo, otearai wa dokodeshoo ka?
Heru e ikimasu! (I made that one up since they don't teach us rude things in Japanese)
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Comic store guy? Do tell more.
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If its any consolation I got a B+ for Photography :)
Damn! Guess they marked everyone hard. Maybe Glen came in and took a grade off everyone who used colour? (jokes)
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My friend Dave and I have agreed that dating a woman with the exact same hobbies and likes as you is not going to work. You THINK having a girl who loves comic books and video games and whatever stupid music you all listen to and whatever crappy movies you all like is the best possible world; but it won't be! Having those seperate hobbies is a GOOD thing! Yeah, make sure she's accepting, understanding, and open to your own hobbies or it's not going to work either.
The answer is the hobby overlap.
Things I like that my boyfriend doesn't- comics, old movies, art, sewing, books of all genres and drinking.
Things my boyfriend likes that I don't like- computer programing, chess, playing Halo for 8 hours at a time, Laser Strike and Dido.
Things we both like- Buffy, The Simpsons and Futurama, pro wrestling, sci-fi and Jet Li films.
Voila- different enough not to bore each other yet similar enough to have common ground for conversation, and not spend more than 20 mins trying to pick out a video we both want to see.
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This time I've gotta do a round kick board break a.k.a. 'in advance of a broken toe'.
I'm less pissed off already. Fuck 'em. I'm already starting a career outside of art school, I don't need to get perfect marks to suceed in the 'outside world'. Plus heaps of people whose opinions I really care about like my work, not just people with a Phd in artwank.
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I'm grading on Saturday the 18th, but i've got to work alot on takedowns, chin na and choke holds before then. If this mood holds whoever I'm partered with will be having a bad time of it.
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And I failed Elementary Japanese Language because I stopped going to lectures so I could get more photography done.
Truth, Dare, Double Dare?
in Bring the Noise
Posted
Well on several occasions I did give in to pressure from my boyfriend and watched Dawson's Creek with him.
Did I enjoy it despite myself? Only by constantly imagining slapping the whiney brats. Plus I generally got lucky afterwards. Which meant I felt pretty damn good the next morning.