Lost_Johnny

real hot with a bit of milk and one sugar please...

...and with a dram of very cheap whiskey in on a cold winter's day.

And I don't even need the lady-magnetic powers.

Ah yes but imagine combining your power with that of the shirt - my God man you'd be unstoppable, but remember as that wise old sage once said:

"with great power comes great responsibility!" you have been warned.

On second thoughts better let Wolvy have any spare shirts, it sounds like he'd appreciate the extra power of the lady eating shirts.

If Birmingham City sign Lee Bowyer I will only be able to go and watch them when the [over-used word] is suspended.

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You didn't have anything to do with this did you Ade

and delivered by God himself.

It's ok Johnny, I meant him

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I see some of us are still missing.

Happy birthday to those who had birthdays yesterday, I've just realised where you can see who's special day it is - doh.

Anyway when I'm rich and famous this is where I'll take you all.

And I would flip my wig if I got my hands on  Honor Blackman....

I bet the guy on the cover kept getting it wrong just so Ms Blackman would have to wrestle him to the ground again.... and again.... and again.... I think I need to go and sit down.

Lost Johnny: You're not AGREEIN with that statement, are you? 

Of course not Red, merely poking fun at my own poor downtrodden existence 8-) I wouldn't dare agree with it

Another hug for Selkie - just wondering, have you got a mate who you can just go away with for a weekend. Sometimes you need space to breath, just get away from everything for a couple of days. You sound like you take on a lot of responsibility for other people, perhaps it's time to call in a few favours and concentrate on pampering yourself for a couple of days.

Someting good will turn up, fingers crossed.

The politics of fear, the religion of hatred.... twats.

Mind you in every puddle of puke a golden edible nugget of carrot exists:

"The demise of our community and culture is the fault of sissified men who have been overly influenced by women."

.....I wonder what would happen if I try that one out on the missus.

...This year we got told there was no space for our stall as it had been taken up with something else (along with 20 other small shops), we were not too bothered as we both are booked up with other work.

I see they managed to fit in this tosser though, makes me mad.

I haven't been since 92 but the really enjoyable times for me were 86 - The Cure, Half Man Half Biscuit and Bragg (I think) & 87 - Julian Cope. We used to be able to get on the Green Field for free back in those days, I even managed to make a bob or two selling painted tobacco tins.

We're going to try and take the kids to the Ashton Court Festival near Bristol this year (July 16th and 17th) not sure if we can make it though, but if you're looking to run a stall it's usually pretty busy with a good atmosphere.

Looking forward to:

A History of Violence: haven't read the GN but I'm always excited about a new Cronenberg film, trailer looks good.

Hellboy 2: agree with the other two fantastic fun.

Sin City 2 & 3: Now they've got the perfect formula can they go wrong with these?

Fuck.

If Birmingham City sign Lee Bowyer I will only be able to go and watch them when the [over-used word] is suspended.

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Went to see "League of Gentlemen's Apocalypse" tonight. Bit underwhelmed really, I enjoyed the TV series especially the darker third series, but the movie seemed to rely a bit too much on Herr Lipp's innuendos.

A few good lines, which made me laugh;

Tubbs sat on a loo "I made a little brown fish"

Barbara (transexual taxi driver) "There's not been a deluge like this since my last period"

Papa Lazarou (my favourite character) aftering coughing up a fur ball: "Iz difficult to fit in".

Worth seeing if you're a fan but could have been done as a 60 min TV special really (apart from the budget I guess).

I've heard the Wicker Man remake with Nicholas Cage is back in production, is nothing sacred (in a pagan sort of way). Apparently his character is not even going to be a virgin in this version, as that wouldn't be manly enough for him - should make for an interesting finish:

Cage: "In the name of God man, think what you're doing."

Laird (Stallone anyone?): "We offer up this sacrafice of a virgin...."

Cage: "Hold on a minute I lost my cherry when I was 15, I've had thousands of girls since then"

Laird: "What, oh shit, sorry, hold on a minute we'll get you down from there"

"Sippy cups:"

http://tinypic.com/5xvpec

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....aaaah ain't that sweet. Charlie you're a great Dad, you've even poured Lou's Bud into his sippy cup for him

Van Persie's just been arrested too, on rape charges.

WTF have they all been watching Footballers' Wives???

More importantly, Burnley have just signed Stoke striker Gifton Noel Williams on a free, so now we don't actually have a recognised striker

We are well and truly knackered - John, any chance of loaning Vaughan for the season -cough-

For me the most disturbing results of this media circus, are that:

1. This has probably made it a thousand times worse for any kid who is being abused to manage to come forward and get the support they need to get out of their nightmare.

2. We again witness the mass hysteria of people needing to associate themselves with an event/celebrity which in reality has nothing to do with them but which they form a fanatical obsessive personal attachment to, usually to the detriment of their own individual lives.

i.e. the idiot with the placard reading "Michael on behalf of humankind we're sorry" can shove it up their arse sideways.

As for Jackson, who fucking knows, all I'm sure about is that anyone who dangles their baby out of a top floor window for the amusement of others is not fit to be a Dad and should be barred from having custody of any children.

Oh and Josh, you make some very valid and true points but don't you think that his attempts to reject any physical or visual sign of ever being black, make that part of the possible motivation behind the half arsed attempt to prosecute him irrelevant?

I got taken to the theatre by the missus on Saturday, first time we've been out together for about 18 months due to our youngest sprog, Gabriel, being a bit of a handful for babysitters (he's lovely really, just very strong and headbutts walls if he doesn't get his way! Should have known better with a name like that!).

Anyway she took me to see The Graduate...... Front row with a naked woman only about 2 feet away .....methinks she's testing me!

Oh it was very good by the way..... the acting I mean.

Congrats Akhira, great picture as well.

Happy birthday Pooka - one question why are your friends glasses full but you've got an empty bottle or glass near you on most of the pictures :wink:

Selkie - good luck with the rescue - I suggest ninja outfits!

JC: I'm so glad all my old friends could come to my fiftieth birthday party.

Bad move by Man United, Van Der Sar two years ago would've been a strong buy but now ?  They should've gone in for Given.

 

As for the World Cup, Brian Kerr's inability to keep his squad focused for 90 minutes, combined with his now obvious fear of scoring goals, means that Ireland are unlikely to be present.

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I'm glad Man Ure went for Van Der Sar, I was worried they might pinch Simenson

Seriously though Simo has been superb for us last season - just need to find two strikers, two wingers, two midfielders, two defenders to go with him and we'll be sorted.

As for Liverpool, I personally thought it was the right thing to do to let them into the qualifying rounds, as long as none of the other 4 clubs lost out - I hadn't twigged though that it would mean that the TV money would then have to be split five ways instead of four though, not so bad for Chelski, but must piss you lot right off.

And Bellamy?? Not sure about that one, do you reckon Moyes can handle his strops? If not Stoke can always make another comical loan bid for him like last season :icon_redface:

If I'd still get Social Security and SSI if I moved there. And some other stuff. I need the SSI thing because that would be my fall back money if I was jobless there. It would cover the rent and the bills. I'd just need to transfer my Bank account money from here to there. Then register for school, and get used to the area (where the comic shop, The mall, The grociery store, and the other places are), and stuff like that.

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Sounds to me Wolvy like you really want to go but the bureaucracy involved is a bit overwhelming, in which case I can completely understand you wanting to sort everything out but don't let that stop you, go for it! If you haven't got too many ties at the moment then this will probably be one of the best chances you get. (if you keep them sweet back at home you can always go back if everything goes tits up!)

Can you apply to study there? Found a bit from a Mobility USA website that might help:

b) The SSI Study Abroad Provision

The Social Security Handbook states:

"A student of any age may be eligible for SSI benefits while temporarily outside the U.S. for the purpose of conducting studies that are not available in the U.S., are sponsored by an educational institution in the U.S., and are designed to enhance the student's ability to engage in gainful employment. Such a student must have been eligible to receive an SSI benefit for the month preceding the first full month outside the U.S."

To receive SSI while studying abroad:

· The required course of study must not be available in the United States

· It must be sponsored by an educational institution in the United States

· It must be designed to substantially enhance your ability to work

· You must be eligible for SSI for the one month immediately prior to leaving the country

· You must earn academic credits towards a degree while abroad

· SSI benefits are available while studying abroad for up to one year if the qualifications are met

· If you are an SSI recipient planning to study abroad ask your Benefits Specialist for more information

Also, Pass Plans are an option. Read the Using Social Security or Vocational Rehabilitation for Exchange brochure for more information. See the Social Security website for specifics on the study abroad determinations.

Otherwise can your friends sort out some sort of temporary job, so you can put that on your application form, just while you move up there maybe? Or failing that abuse your friends' hospitality doss at one of their places and claim squatters' rights.

Seriously though sounds like a real adventure good luck.

It's got a robot cat's chance in Development Hell.

.... sorry, I'll get me coat.

Just came across this from the BBC news website:

The Big Brother beauty contest

one more step on the road to Gattaca, where's Patrick Bateman when you need him.

Calling all Fall fans - just been sent this great lost clip of Mark E. Smith performing White Lightning on an old Jonathan Ross show, the volume is a bit low so turn it up and enjoy!

White Lightning

it was absolutely brilliant. He performed pretty much all of his greatest hits with the band and nearly all of his new album. and on top of that he paused in the middle of the set for a small acoustic session of stuff from Sea Change. 

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