A. Heathen

Anyone notice a LARGE inconsistency in the highlighted parts of the last two paragraphs ?

If there is another Constanteen adventure, Cappello has some definite, unexpected places he would like to take the character. “The funny thing is, everyone always says ‘origin story’ “ Cappello notes. “They’re doing that with Batman, but I don’t want to go there; I don’t think that would be the best choice. But you can have John [Constanteen] rediscover himself. That lends it to loads of ideas. I also believe that you can’t keep on doing movies about the Devil and God. John deals with the occult; he works against demons and evil in this world. But that doesn’t mean it always has to be these giant things like the Devil taking over.

 

“The world can also end by the hand of God,” observes Frank Cappello. “that’s what Revelations is about, and what would be interesting to me is if John [Constanteen] stood in the way of that

, because he is for humanity. Man, I would go crazy with that!”

I'm posting this in full for one day only, and thereafter keeping some key points to generate discussion. If you are quoting, please do not quote the whole article.

Throughout I have corrected the spelling of the film title, and clarified that when they refer to "John" they mean "John Constanteen".

As I've said before, I wish that these two guys had spent some time on the forum, so we could have discussed our differences - I don't think they are devoid of passion for the character - just misguided by voices from Hollywood.

Starlog/March 2005

WRITING CONSTANTEEN by Kim Howard Johnson

Kevin Brodbin and Frank Cappello went to hell and back adapting the fantasy world of Hellblazer.

The stench of cigarettes and sorcery is in the air and Keanu Reeves is dressed in black, as one of the most enigmatic anti-heroes in comics hellblazes a trail onto the big screen in Constanteen.

Reeves has often expressed an desire to play a comic book hero on film and gets his wish as he brings supernatural detective John Constanteen to life in this fantasy-thriller, helmed by first time director Francis Lawrence. But it has taken more than six years to realise the DC/Vertigo comic as cinematic fare, and during that time multiple directors, writers and some of the biggest names in Hollywood have been attached to the project.

The edgy, self-serving loner at the heart of Constanteen was created y writer Alan Moore for the Saga of Swamp Thing #37, the influential horror title that inspired the Vertigo comics line. Constantine - who walks through a supernatural world of demons and angels – began a recurring role in Swamp Thing and soon spun off into his own long-running Hellblazer series in 1988. Still, despite his popularity with comics fans, Constantine stayed below the radar in Hollywood for another decade. Now with Reeves in the role that may be about to change.

ORIGINAL SINS

In the film, Constanteen teams with sceptical policewoman Angela Dodson, played by Rachel (The Mummy) Weisz, to investigate the mysterious suicide of her twin sister. Soon they’re searching for a legendary religious relic and Constanteen is challenging the Devil. “Keanu doesn’t play the role as a dark character, but you just know that there’s so much going on with this guy beneath [the surface]” says co-writer Kevin (Mindhunters) Brodbin. “You know that he’s literally haunted by the ghosts of people from his past.”

The first of three writers who worked on the screenplay, Brodbin was a fan of the original Hellblazer series, and that eventually lead to his scripting the film. “I’m irish and I became a Hellblazer collector with the first issue,” says Brodbin. “I’ve always thought he was one of the most interesting characters in any medium – he’s like James Dean spliced with Bogey. I came over here to do the starving writer bit and I sold a couple of spec scripts. Hellblazer was my dream project and I was put in touch with [batman and Swamp Thing producers] Michael Uslan and Ben Melniker, who had the rights. We started taking it around to different studios, but because it was an English character in a comic book they had never heard of – it was not like X-Men, with a built-in audience – people were saying ‘Hellraiser? Haven’t we already done five of those?’ Because people weren’t really familiar with Constantine, we decided to make him an American. I believe that as long as the voice of the character works then the accent doesn’t matter.

“We tried to make the character and the story so compelling that it could be seen as a stand-alone movie. I pitched it to Warner Bros, to an executive I had once temped for. My little sound-bite was that Constantine is ‘the rock and roll star of the occult’; he’s an exorcist who doesn’t do it for religious reasons. It’s almost an extreme sport for him. Constantine doesn’t want to care about people, but can’t help himself. And they went for that.”

Although the script went through a number of changes, Brodbin notes that the final plot remains similar to the one he originally devised. “My Story was close to the one that’s in there now,” says Brodbin. “Constanteen is probably not quite as reluctant in this version. In the final film, he starts off performing an exorcism, whereas in my script he’s more of a con man of the occult – selling fake relics to rich occultists. And my story was set in New York, which I thought was more gothic and scary, though I have to say that Francis has made LA look like you’ve never seen it before.

Most of the characters I introduced are still in there, like Angela, the female detective, and Balthazar, the demon; and Father Hennessy [Pruitt Taylor Vince] made it in as well. They’re all there. Papa Midnite [Djimon Hounsou] is from the comic book, and [co-writer] Frank Cappello brought in Chaz [shia LeBeouf], Constanteen’s young apprentice. Francis did an amazing job of casting all of the people around Constanteen. The minute I heard that he cast Tilda Swinton as the angel Gabriel, I was like ‘Cool move!’ And having Gavin Rossdale of Bush as Balthazar is great – he’s really slick, creepy and good at the same time!”

Brodbin drew on the comics when he crafted his story and particularly liked the storyline in which Constantine learns that he’s dying from lung cancer. “Jamie Delano’s first issues really guided me on the character and tone,” says Brodbin. “I thought Garth Ennis’ Dangerous Habits story was an amazing concept, too: having your character, in the first twenty minutes of the film, realize that he’s going to die.”

DANGEROUS HABITS

After Brodbin finished, Mark (Godsend) Bomback worked on revisions and then Cappello became the third writer on the project. “I’ve worked on this for nearly five years,” Cappello note. “I was working with [producer] Lauren Shuler Donner on other things when Warner Bros asked me to read the script. It was okay but it felt very Indiana Jones-ish, with lots of action-adventure elements – people shooting each other in Chinatown. I didn’t know if I wanted to do it, but they sent me two of the Hellblazer graphic novels, Fear and Loathing and Dangerous Habits, and when I read the actual comics, I flipped out. I said ‘Oh my God, this is a character I’ve never seen!’ Constantine is an irreverent guy. The closest thing to him in America would be Denis Leary – a guy who doesn’t give a damn about anybody but himself. But I thought that Constantine wasn’t captured in the script, and that the story shouldn’t be about plot – it should be about character.

“Originally, there was a question of whether or not I was the right person for the job, so I came up with an opening scene. I asked myself, ‘What would an exorcism look like with John doing it?’ I kind of ripped off the original Exorcist. I said, ‘Let me come up with a scene in which you think you’re seeing the original Exorcist, with a girl in trouble and a priest over his head. The John comes into the mix and turns it all upside down. This isn’t your father’s Exorcist!’ I wrote an eight page scene before I even got the job, and that sealed the deal. Everybody loved it and it’s still in the movie – almost exactly how I wrote it five years ago! I saw the film months ago at a test screening, and I thought it was amazing that I had written something that they shot almost verbatim, just as I conceived of it. That was really fun!”

A longtime Starlog reader, Cappello didn’t even know the Hellblazer comic book existed when he was handed the first screenplay. “It was only when I started reading the graphic novels that I even got interested in working on it,” he admits. “Dangerous Habits is about John dying of cancer, because he has smoked all his life, and how he saves himself. Many of those ideas were in the comic. I even put a scene back in between John and Gabriel that people who have read the comic and the script have said “My God, it’s like you took it verbatim [from Hellblazer].’ The gist of it is exactly the same, because why throw out what already works? I love the comic book, and I’ve read almost every single one of them. There are many things I am sure the fans know more about that I do, but I wanted to capture the atmosphere and the character, who John really is.”

Cappello tried to retain many comics elements, but certain things had to be changed. “In the comic, John has ghosts that follow him around,” he says. “You can’t really have that in a movie; it would look hokey. But you can have that feeling of the ghost inside him. Also, in the comic, John is pretty much a downbeaten guy. I find the later comics a little boring, because you have a man who has done great things in the past, but now he’s living with all these people who hate him. I’ve looked at some of the fan websites and the fans say they loved the original writers because they took Hellblazer in a different direction. So I invented things for this screenplay, like John’s past and how he got the ability to do magic. In the comic, he just learns it. I thought there had to be some spark somewhere, so there’s a flashback to when he was a child. It only lasts for about 45 seconds, but it gives you an idea of who John [Constanteen] was when he was starting out. He has a brother, a sister, a mom and a dad. If they ever do the sequel, it would be interesting to see what his other life is like.”

HARD TIMES

Both writers acknowledge that switching the hero’s nationality from English to American was one of the more controversial changes. “As long as the voice of the character is real, his accent [shouldn’t be an issue],” says Brodbin. “We would have loved to do John as an English character, but there were practicalities to be considered. There are very few [british] actors whom a studio would take a chance on with this kind of budget.”

While Constanteen’s nationality was never specified in the script Cappello saw when he came on board, the story was always set in Los Angeles. As Cappello recalls, “My whole argument for making him British was that if you’re aiming for a PG13 – which I don’t agree with, I think this film should be an R – and John is English, I could have him use all sorts of cuss words that are British slang but would pass in a PG13 movie. I could have used terms like ‘bloody’ and ‘wanker’ which are really colourful.

“But John [Constanteen] not being British is a silly reason not to see the movie,” he adds. “John [Constanteen] can still have the same ideas and pissed-off attitude. Just because he doesn’t talk about the Queen … well, we have problems in our own country, so we can cut down our government just as much as John does his! We’re making John [Constanteen] bigger, more universal! When people watch the film, they’ll see that John [Constanteen] is still a smartass. He doesn’t have patience for people and he doesn’t give a damn, but we’re also catching him at a time when he isn’t as powerful as he once was. John has pretty much given up, but then someone comes into his life and sparks his interest, and he becomes John Constanteen again. He ends up saving himself with the biggest con of his life, and it just comes to him – it isn’t like he has some ultimate plan: ‘That’s John Constanteen – he’s always conning people, even the Devil!’ I used to tell people in the meetings, ‘Don’t worry about the uber-plot, because if all the audience is concerned with is “do we save the world?”, we’re screwed!’ We really want them to worry about whether John [Constanteen] is going to save himself.”

In the script, the 16 year old Constanteen commits suicide. “When John [Constanteen] kills himself, his soul goes to Hell, but through the power of modern medicine, they bring him back after six minutes,” Cappello explains. “But those six minutes in Hell are like a lifetime and John returns with the ability to know who is evil and who is not, just by looking at them. That’s different to the comic, but I don’t think it’s inherently wrong. We’ve never seen it, so why not invent it? Some people only see the comics, some people only see the movies, but in two hours, you want to bring the audience into a whole new world that they’ve never been to before. However, you have to give some points of reference, things that the audience has heard of. To watch a guy just walking and moping around, and then have people come up to him, slap him [on the back] and say ‘You did it!’ really doesn’t make for an interesting movie. But if Constanteen is successful, then everybody will think that’s the way the comics are, and the fans will be even madder! There’s no way to win in this situation.”

Brodbin didn’t set out to make specific changes from the comic book, other than those necessary to adapt it to film. “You have to make alterations because they are such different media,” he says. “When you’re dealing with a character who’s on the dark side like Constanteen, the story has to be compelling enough to keep you involved every second. The story I created – and I think it’s pretty much still there – involved this relic turning up that has been touched by Christ, and this relic can give the Devil the ability to walk the Earth. In my version, there were three devils, similar to the three spirits in one Christ – three devils in one Devil – but it was thought that might be too confusing. So that changed. In my script, the relic was one of the nine inch nails used to crucify Christ, but Mark came up with the Spear of Destiny. It’s now somewhere between the two; it’s only the top of the Spear, so it’s almost like a nine-inch nail.”

GOOD INTENTIONS

Several years ago, Tom Cruise was discussed for the title role, and at one point comics fan Nicolas Cage was attached (when Constanteen was more of an action-adventure script). The project returned to its comic book roots after Reeves became interested, and both Cappello and Brodbin believe he’s perfect for the role. “Keanu brings a different take to it,” says Cappello. “He’s a quiet, introspective person and he has sort of portrayed the character that way. In the original script Constanteen was a nasty guy, but when you’re making a $100million film, to have a character who’s totally unlikable … well, that’s something the studio just won’t go for. Keanu was filming The Matrix Revolutions and had read the Constanteen script, and he wanted to meet the writer because there wasn’t a director at that time. So I flew down to Australia and sat with him for three days and nights and talked about what we could change to make the script something he would like to do. And after that he signed on.”

During those three days, Reeves really didn’t refashion the script or character that much. “Keanu’s religion seems to be more of a spiritual faith that is beyond what John [Constanteen] has,” says Cappello, “so Keanu wanted to make sure that – even though this man is on the dark side of the world and doesn’t give a crap about anything besides himself – deep down, he has faith. It isn’t necessarily a faith in God, but a belief in the spiritual. Because Keanu has that within himself, he wanted John [Constanteen] to have some of that too. That makes our John more of a redeemable guy, whereas in the comic, he’s pretty much irredeemable. Keanu’s Buddhist background influenced the character that way.

“We talked about different things,” he continues. “I wrote a bunch of pages and monologues at the end, basically saying that everybody has a place in the world. That’s what Keanu really wanted to get across: That there’s a plan for everyone, even people who don’t believe. John [Constanteen] is a tool who is ultimately being used for good – but he doesn’t realize that. And that would probably piss off the comic’s John – to realize that God has used him. In the film, John [Constanteen] is redeemable. But John should always be tempted, because if you soften him too much, then he loses his edge. He still has to be a guy that spits in the face of God.

The film went through three different directors form the time Cappello signed on, including Paul (Bulletproof Monk) Hunter and Tarsem (The Cell) Singh, before Lawrence – who has directed award-winning videos for Aerosmith, Jennifer Lopez, Will Smith and Britney Spears – took the reins. “Francis has done an excellent job – the movie looks beautiful,” says Cappello. “The tone is right. It’s a very quiet movie, a very serious movie. Constanteen features the same occult material we’ve seen in other films, but it’s done in a completely new way. There aren’t any pentagrams or candles. Some of that is in the graphic novels, but when I was writing the script, I thought, ‘We’ve seen all that. John [Constanteen] dabbles in other worlds, but can’t he do it differently?’ That’s what makes us really like this guy and pay attention to him.”

DAMNATION’S FLAMES

Cappello is also pleased with the movie’s pacing. “There are moments that are held, like John [Constanteen] sitting there smoking a cigarette, knowing he’s going to die, so he might as well smoke another one,” says Cappello. “Nowadays, with so many directors coming out of the video music world, everything is about how fast you can cut. I was worried we were going to have that with Francis, but he let the film breathe and take its time. I know he’s getting offered everything now, so obviously people like what they’ve seen.”

Brodbin is equally happy with the final result, especially with the depiction of Constanteen. “The film gets John [Constanteen] right,” he says. “There are many brilliant things in it, but it’s really about the voice of John Constanteen coming through. Francis had a built-in bullshit detector for what would work and what wouldn’t. It was all about bringing it back to the voice that I had done my best to transfer from the comic.”

Constantine is an unusual hero. “He’s out for himself,” says Brodbin. “but I’m not sure if he’s completely different. He’s a detective of the occult, which was very original when Alan Moore created the character, but everybody has seen that stuff by now. The question is of veracity, and how real John [Constanteen] seems. A friend of mine said that if the child from The Sixth Sense grew up into a mouthy, chain-smoking, hard-drinking guy who hides his emotions behind acerbic wit and acting selfish, that would be John Constanteen !”

Though there may be as many reasons to dislike this supernatural hero as to like him, Brodbin believes that audiences will take to the character. “That is what’s unusual and interesting [about Hellblazer],” he says. I’m not really curious about a hero without flaws. John Constantine has a dirty soul. There are elements of Humphrey Bogart from Casablanca, because John really does not want to get involved. His head tells him to stay out of it, but he has to take action and try to stop terrible things happening. In my story, he looks for help from the angel Gabriel and is turned down, and that remains. Also, the line between the natural and supernatural blurs as they get closer to the relic. In the present film, the closer the relic gets to Los Angeles, the more the supernatural mixes with reality. John [Constanteen] is forced to become involved and it’s his last chance to do something good. It truly is about his redemption. This is someone who has been given a death sentence at the start of the film, and by the end he has to barter his soul to stave off a war between heaven and hell.”

Warner Bros would like to turn Constanteen into a franchise, which is a thought that delights Cappello. “When they start talking about a sequel, I get excited!” he enthuses. “After all these years, three different directors and rewriting the same script fifty times, you would think that I would be burned out but every time they came back to me to try a different approach, I would get excited, because I just love the character and this world – I don’t get sick of it!

“There has been talk that if the first one does well … We’ve thrown a few ideas for a second one – nothing concrete, but we’ll see how Constanteen does,” says Cappello. “I was already proud of the movie after viewing the first cut. I was on the edge of my seat going ‘I know all of this stuff but I’m still worried!’ There are lots of scares, which amazed me, because I didn’t expect that. Francis has shit a very dark, moody and quiet picture.”

If there is another Constanteen adventure, Cappello has some definite, unexpected places he would like to take the character. “The funny thing is, everyone always says ‘origin story’ “ Cappello notes. “They’re doing that with Batman, but I don’t want to go there; I don’t think that would be the best choice. But you can have John [Constanteen] rediscover himself. That lends it to loads of ideas. I also believe that you can’t keep on doing movies about the Devil and God. John deals with the occult; he works against demons and evil in this world. But that doesn’t mean it always has to be these giant things like the Devil taking over.

“The world can also end by the hand of God,” observes Frank Cappello. “that’s what Revelations is about, and what would be interesting to me is if John [Constanteen] stood in the way of that, because he is for humanity. Man, I would go crazy with that!”

Actually it should be "care of Mr Max Eisenberg"

didn't one threads have the link to the scans on one of the keanu-fan sites?

If not, I scan it later.

It's shit compared to the golden age of Mad movie parodies.

But some funny moments.

Shia fans will love it.

New York Times

Exorcism Is Part of the Job Description

By A. O. SCOTT

Published: February 18, 2005

You may recall that in the "Matrix" trilogy, Keanu Reeves played a haunted, expressionless traveler between metaphysical realms whose mission was to unravel a vast, complicated plot to ... well, to do something very bad involving a lot of computer-generated imagery. It may therefore not surprise you to learn that Mr. Reeves, in "Constantine," a new theological thriller from Warner Brothers, plays a haunted, expressionless traveler ... but you get the idea. The thing is, this time his character, John Constantine, wears a skinny tie, white shirt and dark suit combination almost exactly like the one worn by Agent Smith, who was Mr. Reeves's archnemesis in the "Matrix" pictures. I'm still trying to get my mind around that.

In the meantime, I will try to reconstruct some impression of "Constantine," which all evidence, save my own memory, insists that I saw not long ago. It's coming back now: a promising opening, somewhere in the Mexican desert, where a dusty scavenger finds a pointy object (a bit of preliminary text has dropped the clue that it might be the Spear of Destiny) and is promptly crushed by a car that drops from the sky. He survives, sprouts an ominous tattoo and sets off for Los Angeles to bring about the apocalypse.

Meanwhile, John Constantine is wearily patrolling the border between this world and the one below - a landscape bathed in flaming caramel syrup in which there seem to be an awful lot of cars. (Are cars capable of sin, or do some sinners get to take their wheels with them to hell? This is one of many intriguing doctrinal questions never answered by "Constantine.") His work is pretty routine - performing exorcisms, deporting undocumented demons, glowering - until a conspiracy involving the son of the devil threatens to upset the traditional balance between good and evil and throw the world into chaos.

This is similar to the premise of "Little Nicky," an Adam Sandler abomination released in 2000, with Harvey Keitel as Satan, a role here taken by Peter Stormare. But of course "Constantine," directed by Francis Lawrence in glossy music-video style from a script by Kevin Brodbin and Frank Cappello, takes itself much more seriously, with a few clumsy moments of attempted wit. Based on the DC/Vertigo comic book "Hellblazer," the movie tries for a stylized, expressionistic pop grandeur - the kind of eerie, dreamy visual environment that made the first "Matrix" so intriguing - but its look is sticky, murky and secondhand. Its plot unfolds according to the usual numbing alternation of special effects-aided jolts and portentous exposition, most of it involving spurious Bible verses and occultist mumbo jumbo.

Assisting Mr. Reeves are Rachel Weisz, as a Los Angeles police detective whose twin sister (also Ms. Weisz) has jumped off the roof of a hospital, and Shia LeBeouf, as Constantine's eager young sidekick and chauffeur. Djimon Hounsou plays a witch doctor and nightclub owner imaginatively named Midnite, Pruitt Taylor Vince plays an alcoholic priest imaginatively named Father Hennessy, and Tilda Swinton is the Angel Gabriel, adding a touch of high-class celestial cross-dressing to this overblown, overlong attempt - which falls just short of success - to make a movie dumber than "Van Helsing."

"Constantine" is rated R (Under 17 requires accompanying parent or adult guardian). It has many scenes of gruesome violence and occult, demonic themes.

'Constantine'

Opens today nationwide.

Directed by Francis Lawrence; written by Kevin Brodbin and Frank Cappello, based on characters from the DC/Vertigo "Hellblazer" graphic novels; director of photography, Philippe Rousselot; edited by Wayne Wahrman; music by Brian Tyler and Klaus Badelt; production designer, Naomi Shohan; produced by Lauren Shuler Donner, Benjamin Melniker, Michael E. Uslan, Erwin Stoff, Lorenzo di Bonaventura and Akiva Goldsman; released by Warner Brothers Pictures. Running time: 122 minutes. This film is rated R.

I was there, Thanks JohnMc. It was actually pretty typical of a hosted chat. I was surprised at how many questions that weren't about the film got through. I asked versions of the controversy question and something fangirly that I can't even remember now. Neither got through.

Admit it, it was

"Keanu, have you got a girlfr-DO YOU WANT ONE ???"

As great as Mike Carey has been and his knowledge of the Constantine character is beyond reproach

 

*cough*magic reappearing arm*cough* ;)

Erm, Manco and Will Dennis own that mistake, since I expect the script did not say "John's two-armed father points at him angrily, using his previously amputated arm".

Just a guess here.

Fuckin' 'ell though, if it WAS Gabriel trying for some redemption by helping John - now knowing that Constantine has the upper hand in the whole God-humans-Angels thing - that would rock the bloody kasbah !

Esp. in light of recent films purporting to be about "Constanteen".

Just to make this thread different to the other one ;-)

John, you should host a Constantine chat with Tom.

HellBlazin'Squad64: Tom, why do you think this film is a piece of shit?

KeanuLover: Tom, why do you say such nasty things about Keanu's nice new film ?

Matadour: You are MISSING the (whole) point that the balance betwixt GOD and THE DEVIL (as previously described in the song "The Devil came down to Georgia" not just pulled out of my mate Francis's arse) is being undermined AS A CON by CONstantine. Aren't you?

That's a shame.

Did anyone else not get in there ?

(I bet they bugged all the S2Hell IPs ! </conspiracy theory>)

By the same virtue as "You'll like this film because it does not suck as much as you might expect" being a positive review, the reviewers are deliberately putting flaws in their accounts of the Hellblazer comic so that the film does not seem as bad.

At least the only one that has tried to blame the silliness of all that "demon half breeds cheating the game between Satan and God" on the comic series is the EW one.

Perhaps somewhere like Birmingham ?

Bloody good curry afterwards !

Yeah, but mine are right,

and yours just say you don't fucking care about fucking continuity.

:-L

They should change your name to John McMaheen.

Oh shit oh shit.

 

Some people have no shame, do they ?

 

IGN are so far up Keanu's arse that it's embarrassing to read the fawning muck they're spewing out.

 

It's like "Wow! WB flew us out to LA! And we got free Popcorn! And ohmygodisthatkeanureevesohmygodohmygodohmygod!". Just the worst kind of pathetic simpering.

 

I was invited along, lest that sounds like sour grapes

And I still say you should have sent Tom once you knew you could not make it.

Tom: "Jaysis, t'be shure, Oi'm MicMaihon, so I am."

(His welsh accent would fool them beyond that.)

It's Superman and this story is set back when Superman was dead !

Steve Higgins, Vacuumboy9 Today, 05:50 AM

MILLARWORLD Post #155

Hellblazer fans in the making should buy the Rare Cuts trade and join in the GraphiContent book club. we're going to be reading the book and discussing it in detail, like any other book club would.

First three stories should be read by March 15th and the last three by March 31st.

Check it out: http://graphicontent.blogspot.com

http://graphicontent.blogspot.com/2005/02/...nd-mission.html

Entertainment Weekly need taking down a peg a two on their "fanboy" thing.

Don't they know that the fankids are NOT happy ?

The book says Autumn 2004.

You're right. I was thinking of something my grandad used to say, but it was about paraffin not gasoline.

Frank Capello owns Chaz.

Nice one, Frank - no flies on you !

I think the term "gasoline" was in use in the UK in the olden days.

But don't the residents of Hell all speak american english ?

No Tom

We are paying you.

According to Keanuweb, this film is banned in Brunei !

I bought Starlog today which has Frank Capello and Kevin Brodbin competing to see who has put the shittest idea into the script !

Actually they both talk a lot of sense, and unless they are lying, it's a shame they were not given a tad more freedom to create their John Constantein. However, I will type it up so you can see JUST how mad they think we are.

Jesus titty-fucking Christ!

 

I could read that all day!!!!

Read the Mary Poppins review!

It's about a London-based magician !

She's got a very good short story in the British Book of Crime Fiction (or similar, cannot find my copy) which is very Constantinian.

Linked in pedigree to the likes of Ian Rankin and Val McDermid.